The plane ride back from France had been rather uneventful. Besides Shark and Sinbad being in the bathroom too much and someone vomiting, nothing too serious happened.
Any wondrous feelings were set aside when Sinbad requested help in moving out of his current establishment after getting back.
In fact, the two were in the process of packing up his belongings the day after returning home.
“You have a lot of things I don’t think I ever remember you showing me,” Shark said as he rummaged through the drawers.
“In that case, stay out of the bottom drawer.”
Shark would have done well to heed those words. Under a blanket he carelessly threw aside, there was a sight he was unprepared for.
Hearing the yelp and thud of his boyfriend falling back, Sinbad pinched the bridge of his nose, and reiterated:
“Told you to stay out of the bottom drawer.”
“How many of these are there?!” Shark didn’t think he’d seen that many instruments of sexual pleasure in his life.
“Uh, let’s see…” Sinbad knelt down beside him, counting what was in the drawer, then seeming to look over at the bed, resuming: “thirty-seven.”
The sheer number was amazing and frightening. Gingerly, Shark picked up one that didn’t intimidate him.
“Do you still use any of them?”
“Nah. No need. Last I checked, a fleshjack doesn’t sit in its underwear in the morning eating cereal and watching The Almighty Johnsons.”
The initial shock had worn off, and now Shark merely looked at them with curiosity. Sinbad meanwhile had crawled over to his desk to pull something out from under it.
“Tell you what, man,” the redhead murmured as he pulled out an inexplicable fish bowl, “Why not pick one out, and I’ll see if I can’t sell the rest for some money?”
“You really think people in town are going to buy this sort of thing?”
Sinbad snorted. “Remember where we live. I know quite a few people who’d put all these to real good use.”
Dennis nearly choked on the oatmeal he was eating when the two returned home, a box with certain sexual aids in full view.
“We’re back, Dad,” Shark announced as he looked over Sinbad’s shoulder.
“From cleaning out Mister Rotter’s room, or from ransacking the back section of a Spencer’s Gifts?”
Sinbad rolled his eyes as he set the box down, secretly chuckling to himself.
“Relax, boss. I ain’t gonna keep them for long. I’m gonna see if anyone’s gonna be willing to take them off my hands.”
“I would hope so! I’d rather you not turn this home of ours into a house of ill repute! And I hope you cleaned those after use! And keep them away from Lolly, don’t have them out when we have guests-”
Shark couldn’t help but notice his father seemed more on edge than usual.
“Is there something wrong, Dad?”
Dennis sighed and held his head. “I do apologize, boys. I’m a bit riled up for tonight because, well, I was hoping to keep it a secret, but, uh…”
The two younger men dropped what they were doing, and listened intently to what their father and former employer had to say.
“You don’t know her. I met her at the store a day or two before we left for France. Nice lady, got a good amount of gumption to her. Introduced herself and then belched in my face. So anyway, we get to talking, and-”
Sinbad decided to interrupt before it got too far past stopping. “Get to the point, boss.”
“Her name’s Blaise and we’re going out to dinner tonight. Can you two behave until I get back?”
Both of them nodded.
“So where’d your sister say she’d be tonight?” The two were lying in bed that night, waiting for Dennis to arrive home.
“I assume staying over at a friend’s house. When I asked, she told me to go fuck myself with a cactus.” Shark glanced over at what Sinbad was doing to himself, and changed the subject. “How do you carry on a conversation with me while you’re masturbating?”
“You know, even I’m not too sure.” At that point, the redhead closed his eyes and began to make certain guttural noises. It lasted for a few seconds before he relaxed and sighed.
“You done?” Sinbad nodded. He then readjusted himself, and crawled out of the bed. “If you’re gonna make yourself something to eat, I think the Ramen Cooker’s in the cupboard with a Beef Flavor package next to it.”
The redhead grunted to indicate he understood, then wandered back out to the kitchen.
Shark remained in bed, waiting for his boyfriend to get back. He was aware that it took at least three minutes, and however long it took before and afterwards. He usually began counting as soon as he heard Sinbad curse at the microwave.
Oddly, no curses could be heard. Instead, there was a crashing, thudding, and muffled screams. Knowing that wasn’t normal, Shark went to investigate.
Sinbad was frantically attempting to get the fish bowl from earlier off of his head. He was also internally yelling at himself for buying the damn thing in the first place.
By the time Shark had come out to see what was going on, Sinbad was already on all fours trying to ram himself into the walls.
“Sinbad, stop that! You want to risk giving yourself a concussion, or broken glass in your head?” The response was not a coherent one. It was one of futilely clawing at the giant orb of glass stuck to Sinbad’s head.
“How’d you even get this stuck on here, anyway?” The sounds he heard seemed to be ‘I don’t know.’
In an effort to calm him down, Shark joined Sinbad on the floor, attempting to remove the source of the older man’s distress. To his dismay, the fish bowl was on rather tight. Trying to yank harder only resulted in agitated screams.
Not helping matters was the door opening with the two in an awkward position. Shark and Sinbad looked up to see Dennis in the doorway, his date right behind him.
“Why am I not surprised?” The Racket patriarch mumbled as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “Then again, I was likely expecting worse.”
Surprisingly, the woman he was with came up to see what was unfolding.
“Looks like ya got yerselves in a bit of a tight spot, eh? Need some help?” Shark nodded, whilst still trying to yank the bowl off. He moved aside to let her pull off the fish bowl with an almost magical ease.
The moment Sinbad’s head was free from its transparent confines, he was coughing and wheezing.
“Thanks, lady,” he choked out.
“Eh, no problem. I’ve dealt with worse in some of the part-time jobs I’ve had over the years.”
Shark couldn’t help but notice his father making quite the approving face from what he just saw.
“So what do you boys think of Blaise?” Later, after Blaise left, Dennis struck up a conversation with Shark and Sinbad. Shark smiled after hearing her name.
“I like her! And Sinbad doesn’t seem to mind her either. Of course, he’s the one she had to pull a fish bowl off of.”
Sinbad was about to snap at the two when his phone rang. He looked at the name on the screen, then became confused.
“I gotta take this,” the redhead said quickly, leaving the room once again as he answered.
“’Sup, Amy?” Sinbad made sure he wasn’t being listened in on when he got outside. “Of course we’re friends. You ain’t the one I’m mad at about all this.”
Amy was hysterical with fear on the other end. Sinbad waited patiently waited until she was calmer, and listened to her worries.
“Uh-huh…Vomiting, dizziness, cravings, increased urination…What are you trying to tell me here?”
The next few words he heard made his voice raise quite loudly, almost loud enough for the neighbors to hear.
“What do you mean, ‘the condom broke’?! When did this happen? Oh, jeez…Well, did you get tested to make sure? Do the stick thing, see the doc, that sort of thing?”
Sinbad looked over to see Dennis and Shark’s curious faces, wondering what he was yelling about.
“I’ll tell you what you should do; First off, you gotta tell Goodwin. And do it without Jenni around. Tell her you gotta run an errand or something, and tell him you gotta meet him someplace secret.”
The last thing Sinbad ever saw himself doing in his life was giving someone else advice.
“I know you’re scared. If I were you, I’d be fucking terrified. Just tell him, and afterwards see what happens. All right, I’ll talk to you soon.”
Sinbad then said his goodbye, then hung up and went back into the house. On the way back to bed, he made sure the fish bowl from earlier was out of the way for him and anyone else.